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第25部分（第2页）

“Blair？”

Blair　whirled　around　to　see　Pete　standing　in　the　doorframe；　holding　a　bouquet　of　red　roses。　His　face　drained　of　color　as　his　blue　eyes　flicked　between　Blair　and　Nate。　He　opened　and　closed　his　mouth；　like　a　goldfish。

“Pete！”　Blair　squeaked。

He　exhaled　loudly；　the　sound　of　his　breath　filling　the　room　and　morphing　into　a　strangled　cry。　He　hurled　the　flowers　to　the　ground　and　an　explosion　of　red　petals　scattered　on　the　thick　blue　carpet。

“I　can　explain；”　Blair　said　in　horror。　She　knew　how　bad　this　looked。　She　knew　there　really　wasn’t　a　logical　explanation。　But　she　needed　Pete　to　know　this　was　a　total　misunderstanding。　“Please　listen；”　Blair　choked　out；　diving　toward　Pete。

“You’re　in　bed　with　that　asshole？”　Pete　asked。　And　then　he　laughed；　one　short；　angry　bark。　“Of　course　you　are。”　He　shook　his　head。

“No；”　she　protested。　She　felt　like　she　was　going　to　throw　up。　This　could　not　be　happening。　Please　believe　me；　she　silently　begged。　“He’s　drunk　and　he　just　found　me。　He　just　came　in　like　two　seconds　ago。　I　thought　he　was　you。”

Pete　shook　his　head　sadly；　as　if　Blair’s　explanation　was　so　ridiculous　he　felt　embarrassed　even　to　be　hearing　it。

“Dude；　sorry；”　Nate　said；　trying　to　stand　up。　He　understood　this　was　bad。　He　didn’t　want　Blair　to　go　back　to　that　other　guy；　but　he　also　didn’t　want　to　hurt　her。　And　now　he　was；　and　it　was　all　so　fucking　confusing。　His　foot　got　caught　in　a　tangle　of　sheets　and　he　face…planted　on　the　floor。

Karma’s　a　bitch。

“You　deserve　each　other；”　Pete　said；　turning　on　his　heel　and　slamming　the　door。　Blair　could　hear　his　footsteps　tromping　down　the　hall。　The　elevator　whooshed　open　and　he　was　gone。　She　turned　and　gazed　down　at　Nate；　pathetically　collapsed　in　a　pile。

“Fuck　you；”　she　whispered；　her　eyes　finally　filling　with　all　the　tears　she’d　held　in　for　the　past　day。　Every　time。　Every　time。　Every　time　she　was　almost　happy；　Nate　managed　to　fuck　it　up。　Even　worse；　every　time　she　managed　to　fall　for　it。

“But　Blair…”　Nate　struggled　to　his　feet。

Suddenly；　she　felt　the　vodka　sodas　from　earlier　swirling　in　her　stomach　and　knew　she　was　going　to　throw　up。　Just　like　always。　She　felt　like　a　confused　and　lonely　fifteen…year…old。　And　it　was　all　Nate’s　fault。

She　ran　into　the　bathroom；　kneeled　down；　and　retched　into　the　toilet　bowl　again　and　again。　When　she　was　finished；　she　leaned　her　forehead　against　the　cool　whiteness　of　the　toilet　seat；　knowing　she　looked　as　pathetic　as　she　felt。

“You　okay？”　she　heard　from　the　other　side　of　the　door。　Nate’s　voice　sounded　whiny；　the　way　it　sometimes　did　when　he　was　really；　really　baked。　That　was　what　gave　her　the　motivation　to　stand　up；　splash　her　face　with　water；　vigorously　brush　her　teeth　with　her　imported　Marvis　toothpaste；　and　emerge　from　the　bathroom。　Nate　was　standing　at　the　door；　his　hands　at　his　sides；　shifting　from　foot　to　foot。

“Blair—”　he　began。

“Get　out！”　Blair　yelled　with　every　force　of　her　being。　“You’re　bad　for　me。　I　never　want　to　see　you　again。”　She　opened　the　door；　her　whole　body　shaking；　but　Nate　just　stood　there。

“Fine；”　she　said。　“If　you　won’t　leave；　I　will。”　And　with　that　she　was　gone。

Sometimes　misery　doesn’t　love　pany。

puppy　love

Vanessa　banged　around　the　kitchen　of　the　loft；　feeling　like　an　angry　housewife。　It　was　almost　ten　o’clock　and　she　hadn’t　heard　from　Hollis　since　she　stormed　out　of　their　pitch　meeting。　No；　scratch　that。　Since　she　stormed　out　of　his　pitch　meeting。　She　pulled　out　a　mug　from　the　cabinet　and　boiled　water　to　make　tea。　She　wasn’t　one　of　those　people　who　drank　when　she　was　upset；　so　organic　chai　would　have　to　do。

The　worst　thing　about　it　was　that　she’d　done　this　to　herself。　She　used　to　be　a　shaven…headed；　black…garbed；　kick…ass　filmmaker　who　always　wore　steel…toe　boots　and　didn’t　put　up　with　shit　from　anyone。　Now　she　was　this　needy　girlfriend　type　without　any　projects　of　her　own；　without　an　apartment　of　her　own；　and　with　no　one　she　could　even　talk　to。　Last　year；　Vanessa　had　spent　practically　every　Friday　night　with　the　other　NYU　film　majors　at　Bushwick　Country　Club；　a　Williamsburg　bar　with　mini　golf。　But　ever　since　she　and　Hollis　had　bee　serious；　it　had　bee　harder　and　harder　to　carve　out　time　to　meet　with　her　old　friends。　She　considered　calling　her　sister；　Ruby；　but　all　she　and　Piotr　could　talk　about　was　whether　the　fetus　was　the　size　of　a　gerbil　or　an　avocado。

She　heard　the　whir　of　the　elevator　and　felt　her　stomach　twist　in　contempt。　What　the　fuck　was　the　point　of　living　in　Brooklyn　if　you　had　an　elevator　leading　straight　to　your　apartment？

“Hey。”　Hollis　sheepishly　walked　into　the　apartment；　holding　a　box　of　Franzia　wine　out　like　a　peace　offering。　In　his　other　hand　was　a　leash—attached　to　a　brown　and　white　puppy。　The　wine　was　an　inside　joke；　since　one　of　their　first　dates　had　been　at　a　tiny　Chinese　restaurant　that　served　free　boxed　wine。

And　the　puppy？

“Celebrating　your　new　deal？”　Vanessa　refused　to　take　the　wine　from　his　hands　or　even　ask　about　the　dog。　She　grabbed　her　mug　of　tea　and　walked　into　their　newly　set…up　corner　office。　One　side　was　hers；　the　other　his。　She　opened　her　MacBook　Pro　and　clicked　onto　the　apartment　listings　on　Craigslist。　She　didn’t　really　want　to　move　or　break　up　with　Hollis；　but　she　didn’t　know　what　else　to　do。

“Don’t　be　mad。”　Hollis　put　his　hands　on　Vanessa’s　shoulders　and　whirled　her　Aeron